I have heard so many responses from people hearing my pain that I feel like I have to say something.
I have had pain in my life. Not everything has been easy, comfortable, fun. THANK YOU, GOD!
To my parents (who read this): you weren’t perfect. Shocker! Let me start with you. Do you know that I watched you having devotions every morning? In your failures, you sought God, you prayed. You stayed in pursuit of God, even when you weren’t perfect. That is a gift. You read stories to me of Jesus. You had me practice. You were faithful, through the storms. You had me read, a lot. You made me go to church, to youth group, to missionary meetings, where I could see a real God at work. Do I wish you would have behaved better? Yep! Probably about the same way my kids want me to behave better.
Now for the rest of you: I get to play music. I have people from multiple places around the world who listen to me and what I write. These two things just blow my mind. Totally unworthy, but there it is. This past Sunday, I got to watch as 5 and 6 year old children raised their hands in worship. Tonight, I play bass for our youth group and stand in awe of a God who is changing a generation. I wouldn’t trade my life, my pain for anything. GOD IS GOOD!
I share my doubts and struggles because they are voices that have ruled my life for many years. I share my pain because I know that others are walking with me. But those voices aren’t the only ones I hear and we are stronger as we walk together.
Please don’t feel bad for me, ever, for what I’ve been through. Share your stories with me. I bet we’ll find similarities.
And, I bet, if we look at Jesus and listen to the Holy Spirit’s voice in our lives, we’ll see what satan meant for evil, God meant for good.
And HE WINS!