Now you’ll see…

Waiting is always so difficult, so discouraging.

I once was working with a horse that I really liked, but he was stubborn and moved so stiffly. A horse with a rider should move much like a horse with no rider. If not, there is usually either a problem with how I’m handling the horse or the horse is handling me. This was the latter.

I asked for some advice on how to help the horse develop and Lewis Sterrett ( said I should work with him to make him stand still. Much of horse training has to do with a horse in motion, so this was going to be different.

I learned the meaning of the word ‘pissed’ during this time. I didn’t punish the horse or run him into the ground. I just made him stand still. He would get so angry, sweating and foaming at the mouth. He would buck and literally, forcibly urinate. And then I would calmly put him back in the place where we started.

We would all like to see miracles. We would love to be in that place where amazing things happen around us, through us. But no one wants to wait. No one wants to discipline themselves to trust God when nothing is happening.

Moses was eighty when he heard the words, “now you’ll see.” David had run from Saul for many years before he heard them. Simeon waited till he was old, almost dead before he heard them.

A great life is the one that waits for God’s glory to be revealed in it. A great life is one that looks for God to shine through. Anything, ANYTHING else is such a waste.

Help me Lord! I can’t stand still.

Give Glory to God!

The battle for Jericho has begun but it is hardly a battle.  The walls have fallen and the people of the city are panicking.  You run with your spear, stabbing and slashing at any who are in your way.  Though you are not a trained warrior, you have seen battle before and this does not compare.  All that you see is blood and death and blood lust in everyone’s eyes.  And you kill, and kill again.  Women, children, old men, babies, it doesn’t matter.  They all must die.  You are a rational, down-to-earth kind of guy and this all seems so crazy.

You have been going from house to house with others but for the moment find yourself alone.  Your friends have been grabbing things and taking them to a pile outside the city to give to the priests.  After taking several things yourself you find that it just seems a bit unfair.  You enter one last house and there find a robe, some silver and a little bar of gold.  The battle is ending and  instead of taking the things to the priests, you take them home.  You feel guilty but justify it because of your family’s needs and it really wasn’t much so no one will mind.

A couple of days go by and you’re on to the next town.  The guilt and shame of what you’ve done gnaw at you but now you feel the fear of knowing that if you say something, you’ll just get in trouble.  Joshua sends three thousand men to attack a small town and when they return, thirty six of them have been killed.  A warning bell is going off inside of you.  Maybe they died because of what you have done.  A rumor is flying around the camp that the battle was lost because there was sin that someone was hiding.  You almost mention it to your wife.  Your best friend sees you and asks what’s wrong.  Something tells you it would be better to confess and clear your conscience but now you feel trapped.

The next morning, the tribe of Judah is called out.  As the whispers pass between neighbors, you find your heart beating heavily and your palms are sweating.  Your clan, your division, your family and finally you are called out and it is too late.

“My son, give glory to God.”

You confess everything and though you are afraid, you feel free from that guilt, that bondage.  You are lead to the edge of the camp and look to see your wife crying as she stares at you.  Your children are crying too and looking at you to help them.  The people, your neighbors and friends gather around you and you watch as a stone strikes the forehead of your son and he falls to the ground.  Stones are hitting you too but you no longer feel anything.

The story of Achan, told in Joshua 7, is one of the saddest stories I see in the bible.  And it is the story that best fits what happens with pornography and men today.  And I am wise enough to know that church leaders, worship pastors, deal with it everyday.

I call you to not wait till God brings out this hidden failing.  Don’t wait till your family, your life, the life of your children are destroyed by this sin.  Bring it out.  Confront this.  Confess it.  Find a brother to walk through your healing.  Believe that you can still be that hero for your wife, your children.

Give glory to God.