One of the worst moments of my life…
He came up to me all smiles. I was a young dad and to me his look was pure guilty. He was three years old and you know how they are. I immediately questioned him.
“What did you do?”
He continued to smile. The same smile I have grown to love as he has grown into a man. But at the time…
“What did you do?” I asked again.
“Son, if you don’t tell me, I’m going to have to spank you. I need you to tell me.”
So as a strong father who demands respect and wants his children to grow and honor God. I spanked him.
My wife then came out of the house. “Why did you spank him?” She asked. “He wouldn’t tell me what he did,” I replied.
“He wanted to show you that he just dressed himself for the first time.”
Good job dad! Great work!
So I’ve been thinking about that lately and how it changed my parenting, changed me as a person. I’ve been looking at my struggles and the things that weigh down my heart and here’s what I’m seeing.
The more I try to control the outcome of any situation, the more my heart dies. I see people in leadership as enemies. I see peers as competitors. I see people under me as just that, beneath me.
Why? Why would I do that? Why can’t I trust God with outcomes? Why must I push and grasp and worry and listen to so many lies?
Pry my fingers off my life Lord!
Break the hold that sets me on the throne and you out the door!
Free me from my desires and set my heart on You!
I need that.