I am sitting in my fear and unwillingness to move. Sure that I will fail and that all my hopes and dreams will come to nothing. In this mental desert, I find myself dwelling on Moses.
Moses was a great man of God. He was humble and decisive. He was courageous and powerful. He was a lot of things that I would want to be as a man. But he had problems, too. It is interesting to me that when God tells him to go confront Pharaoh in the scene at the burning bush, Moses is found arguing with God. “But Lord, who am I? I’m a nobody. I don’t speak well. What if no one listens to me?” What is surprising me right now is that Moses had legitimate arguments. I’ve heard this story a thousand times and right now it is surprising me.
We don’t know everything about Moses but I am sure he had a speech impediment. He had lost all standing in Pharaoh’s court. He was now a shepherd in the desert of Midian, working for his father-in-law. No land, no title, no army, no presence. And no one did willingly listen to him, not even his own people, initially.
What is stopping me right now? I have no money. I have been a failure for so much of my life. My wife doesn’t trust me, doesn’t believe in me, and she is justified in her opinion. No one is listening and most of the time I feel like no one should listen.
That is accurate but it isn’t real. These arguments work and rightfully hinder any ambition Moses had, that I now have. But not in the face of the greater reality of my King. He determines what He has called me to. He walks out the process, knows the end from the beginning. He commands favor and allows hardship. He speaks over each challenge, each obstacle. And because of Him, the accuracy of my failings becomes nothing, the truth of who I am becomes meaningless in light of the truth of who He is.
And in this, He is glorified. He is praised.