Humans, particularly musicians, are walking contradictions. Monumental insecurities followed by and mixed with untenable pride. What are we thinking?
What am I thinking?
I work with children and so have a constant reminder of who Jesus says are the “greatest in the Kingdom.” Most of the time, I see their fears and constant search for something to build themselves on. I see their amazement at insignificant details and boredom with so much that I think is important. And I come to the end of myself.
The truth, the sure truth is that I don’t know who I am. I can not tell you how important I am to the accomplishment of God’s plan on this earth. I can not see the power He has placed in me. I can’t touch the heavens or plumb the ocean depths. I don’t understand. I can’t….
But He knows me. He sees. He understands. He can. He is the GREATEST!
If I spend too much time on trying to figure this out, reason it out, see the plan, make the deal, order my day, I become God. If I rest, if I trust, if I look to Him, He becomes God to me. I can find my place and know His presence in my moments. What I consider essential falls before His majesty. What I build my life on shatters in the storm of His might and glory, the end of me, the beginning of Him in me.
What awe and wonder, excitement and peace are ours when we take our eyes off ourselves.
I am not the Greatest, but I’ve met Him.
“I am Sparticus!!!”
“I sound my barbaric ‘Yawp’…” HA! HA!
Great insight! YES! I remember going to the PMEA (Pennsylvania Music Educators Association) meeting YEARS ago. I was doubtless the least qualified person there and I had observed musicians in my GREAT Christian college. I was a mix of embarrassed and irritated to hear frequently, “We musicians….” I was able to hold my own in the music teaching world, still do. But I remember the arrogance and pride that troubles anybody who can diddle two tunes on an instrument or voice! It ain’t pretty! So you got my vote! I also remember your songs from many years ago. I thought they were extra special and I wish there were more!