Lately, it has been difficult for me to write. I spend a lot of time working, a lot of time planning, a lot of time being sick, a lot of time doing but can’t find time to write. It is not that I have run out of ideas, I’ve simply run out of space. Getting up at 4:00 has its perks. No one bothers you; no one needs your attention. The down side is when you don’t get to go to bed till 11:00 at night. Can’t keep that up forever (at least I can’t). Now why am I sharing this? I have lately been questioning my sanity. Why do I do this to myself? Why do I keep coming back to something that so few will ever hear? Jesus was rebuked when the crowds cried out with their “Hosannas”. He was told he should have them stop. He said, “If I tell them to be quiet the rocks will cry out.” That’s how I feel. If I were to quit writing it wouldn’t stop the words, it wouldn’t alter the praises. It would only remove my part in the song. And I don’t want to quit singing. I don’t want to quit playing. I don’t want my voice to be stilled. I think I have a unique voice, writing style. I don’t think I say much that is monumental but it comes from my heart and God often uses what comes from inside us in monumental ways. My weakest efforts, laid at His alter, open to His Spirit, can be used for something great. But even if they aren’t, I can’t stop. I don’t think rocks have the best voices either.
The Healing Worshipper
Though storms of life may rage, I will trust, I will rest and I will worship!
The Healing Worshipper 
Our Father is the greatest teacher there could ever be. Who guides me when I let Him and teaches me when I listen.
He is the conductor of this beautiful symphony singing within my heart. He is the music, the instrument, the player, the audience.
What a wonderful feeling it is to know that this is what loves me more than I can love; looks out for me, cares for me in every way and holds my attention like nothing else can.You had me at hello.
You’re why I wake up in the morning, why I breathe, why I live and there is no greater pleasure in life than serving You.
Awesome the way you put this. We live for our King, our Savior, our Hero.
Yep, no need for rocks when we have writers like you. I read a lot of what you write to my girls during our bible study and we talk about how we each related to what you wrote. So it helps us. We enjoy your words very much, and thank God for them. Thanks for sharing.
So glad to hear this. Thanks. Not good at expressing my appreciation but truly blessed to know that you are blessed.
This is how I have felt so much lately, too, Matthew. Have had such battles with ministry with the kids here. I had someone ask me recently why I keep doing this with all that I’ve gone through. The simple answer is, how can I not? The lost are still out there and there is eternity. How I can I not tell of all that God has done in my life?! How can I not share the healing that is only available through Him?! Nope, you’re right–it’s not time for the rocks to start yet.
There are times I tell myself, I’m done. Nobody cares or reads anyway. But then something comes up and I’m writing it in a journal for “posterity” to read some day after I’m gone, and I think, why not just put it out there for all to see? It ebbs and flows, waxes and wanes, comes and goes, just like just about everything in life.
Thanks for expressing it though.
Haven’t heard anything from you in a while. Keep writing my brother!