Abraham shared a covenant with God that was symbolized by what many consider a barbaric act. God’s symbols typically are rich with meaning in their original languages and contexts. However, I am not a scholar of Hebrew or Greek. I did not live in ancient Palestine and can not see all that went into His choices for this ritual. All I know is that He asked me.
There are a few things that I hold dear to my heart. My wife has dealt with more than her fair share of eccentricities and erratic behavior. She has loved me and stood with me through life. My children are amazing and I am so proud to be a part of their lives. Music makes my world go round, especially when I am sharing it with those I love. And then there’s me.
In my thoughts regarding my person I believe that I would die for my family. I would sacrifice my will to help others know Jesus. I would cut off my hand, never play another chord, if it would save one child. But would I?
Would I take what is most vulnerable, most sensitive, in my heart and life and lay it before my King, allowing Him to cut away all that is not needed? Can I accept the loss of blood, the continued pain of what is gone, the visible scars of what once was for the rest of my life?
“Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief,” a man once told Jesus. You ask if I am circumcised? No, I am not. I hold so tightly to the things You would take or alter. I fear Your loving hand, knowing full well that it is only my flesh that I cling to. Once again, I give You permission to pry my fingers away and take me for Yourself. I am Yours. I have no other hope.
I love this, Matthew. When I was asked to become the Director for CEF in Curry County, I did not know then that it meant I would have to step away from teaching children FOR NOW, which is one thing I KNOW I can do and am ‘safe’ with my kids. It took the Lord 3 months to get through to me on that. I held tightly to what I wanted–determined that there was NO WAY that could be different from what He wanted. How faithful HE is and how HE loves us–how patient and kind. Thanks so much, once again, for being willing to share your heart and bring to my Lord in tears because of WHO HE IS!! Love you!